So our middle child got married a month ago and since then has had to do all the name changing stuff to get her new life started. It really has been a transition for the whole family, even if she lives across town, it's a big change. My ability to move with the times isn't my forte and even my boss told me that earlier this year with my review...."You don't do well with change." speaking about all the new rules of retail incentives in the job. Anyway, my daughter getting married while still in college at the young age of 21 has been a struggle for me, but we supported her as you can see by my previous post and wish them well in their lives together.
The other day she invited me to take a zumba class with her at the gym her husband and she joined. I accepted and met her there ready to zumba away. She was all made up and pretty, so I asked her, you wear make up to work out? She said, "No, i had to get a new license and today I had my picture made." Oh, you are now officially (our last name and her new married name)! She said no, I dropped my last name and kept my middle name. My jaw dropped, my heart went into my throat.....I was floored. I asked her why would you do that? She said, I'm not discussing this with you, it's my decision." I stood there for a moment, feeling blown away, speechless, and then realizing I couldn't go through with the class, picked up my stuff and left.
Over the past 4 days I have been struggling to understand why she would drop the name that is her history, that represents her grandfather, her own daddy, as well as the family of her origin. Why she would be happy with removing a name that was her home, family, and the love she received from it. My husband wasn't as upset as I was, but still he was upset. I don't know....I just can't get this way of thinking. She says she didn't want 2 last names and that a name doesn't mean the same anymore...that she will always be from our family, she just doesn't have to have it as her name.
I don't get it......I really don't......