Welcome to the Lord's table, this is your celebration, this is our celebration!
Please remove the gum from your mouths, fasting includes chewing gum.
Please have everyone in your family sit tight and listen for one hour, I promise if you listen it will be interesting.
Check out your outfit, it is one that you would wear to greet your Savior, the Creator of the universe?
Has everyone gone to the bathroom before getting here? It's just an hour, if you are school-aged, you can wait until Mass is over.
Please turn off your electronics for one hour, Yahoo mail can wait for your reply....unless you are a doctor.
When it is time for the "Great Amen" Please say it loud! If you believe that Christ is truly present in the Eucharist, that a miracle just happened in the changing of the bread and wine into Christ's body and blood. Then say, "AMEN" with enthusiasm.
If you are serving today at Mass as Usher, Greeter, Eucharistic ministers, please dress up!
I'm sure I have more, but until then.....